Up Your Mitt And Get Back In The Game
I couldn't be happier for you. I
say this assuming that you are not a widow or widower. If you have
an interest in this page, it's probably because a prior marriage
of yours has concluded. You may have wanted it to conclude, or
maybe you didn't. You may have been the first to know is was concluding,
or maybe the last.
Either way, I'll bet it was an
ordeal wasn't it? And I'll bet a painful one at that. There
were all those expectations - the house,the kids, the "happily
ever after" that didn't come to pass. Some experiencing
the trauma of divorce seem to take it in stride, for most though,
it will be the death of a dream.
We human beings are a complicated
lot, living complicated lives. Maintaining a happy marriage
is beyond the abilities of half who attempt it, no matter how
well intentioned they are. Indeed some problems will only become
apparent to couples only after they get married; for if there
is a weakness in the relationship, or in either personality,
the rigors of marriage will surely find it.
Society and unfortunately many
religions often add to the problem by shaming those who prematurely
their marriages. Added to that is ones' own desire not to have
a "failed marriage." But many who stay married to
avoid the stigma of divorce spend decades in barren and often
abusive marriages- all not to let down someone else's' expectations.
I want you to know some things
up front- that prior marriage of yours wasn't a failure. That
marriage went as far as you both could take it. It reached
a point where it was no longer tenable- and then it concluded.
I've married thousands of couples, not one of which ever told
me " Thanks Tom!, I hope we get a few months or a few
years out of this." All wanted to take their marriages
to the grave.
I have no guilt or shame for you
and I have no questions about your marital history. I personally
hope you forgive what can be forgiven, and look at your
prior marriage as the learning experience that it was.
I am also hopeful that you just
might be entering into a relationship with the love of your
life. The one that was meant to be, and the one you deserve.
And to that end, I intend to fully advocate you in front of
all your friends and family. I think you'll find that they,
like me, couldn't be happier for you.